How did I get into photography?
I’ve been playing around with a camera for as long as I can remember. When I was young my father used to take me on little photography excursions. He would lend me his camera so I could capture my view on the world. Architecture was one of his interest which meant learning how angles and perspective played tricks with the eye. It also meant learning how to set up shots in some cramped, awkward spaces. When you only have one viewpoint to work with – you get creative.
Over time I turned the camera from buildings to people. I was fascinated with how different a person could look from one click to the next. I liked being able to show people that it was all about perspective. If you’re always looking down to get an opinion of yourself, well, you’re looking down on yourself from the get-go. That doesn’t leave much hope for a positive perspective, now does it?
I grew up with some serious self-esteem issues. I have a very different view of myself than the rest of the world. Photography is my way to work towards changing that; that’s why I turned the camera on myself.
Why do I model?
I take photos because I enjoy it. Being playful and teasing the camera gives me a real rush. I’m also a sensual being and enjoy showing that in my content. As a lover of the female form I can’t help but admire my own curves. It’s why I love being my own photographer! When I want to see something I can try to capture it myself.
Self photography has given me a chance to express myself in ways I otherwise couldn’t. I’m able to look at my body through a different lens. You see- I don’t wear makeup. I’ve cut/colored my own hair since middle school. When it comes to clothes I adore thrift shopping and doing my own alterations. I haven’t had a snapchat in over eight years. I’m not much of a drinker, bar-goer and the furthest thing from a party girl you could imagine. (I envy those with the energy for that lifestyle.) You could say; I’m not as exciting as I look!
I have so very many different sides. Not all of them get the opportunity to play dress up- their style doesn’t fit in with my boring life. While I do doll up for the fun of it, it feels a bit wasted if I’m the only one who sees it. When I’m happy with how I look I want to show off. I’d say “sue me” but I really rather you didn’t! ;P
I started to take photos of myself about ten years ago. It started as a way to work on my self-esteem. When I would doubt myself I turned to my camera to change my perspective. Sometimes all it takes is a different angle to change your mind. This is especially true with photography! A few centimeters to the side and your stomach goes from looking bloated to drool-worthy.
Every time I post a photo my anxiety does a little dance. There’s no telling who will decide to post a negative comment or make a snide remark. Behind a screen some people feel compelled to point out perceived faults in detail. They mirror the self-conscious thoughts running through my mind in a cruel taunt.
That’s where you come in. You interrupt those negative thoughts by showing me you enjoy my content. Be it likes, comments, shares, etc.- it encourages me to keep going.
It used to be that a comment about cellulite on my thighs would break me. Why? I used to hate my body, my legs in particular. It was so bad that I only wore full-length jeans for years. Not-so-fun fact: I own so many leggings because I always wanted to keep my legs hidden.
Not anymore! I’m not afraid to say that I love my body. I work hard to maintain it and treat it with respect. (Hence never being a drinker nor drug user.) This is why I don’t do ANY touch up editing. You will never see me perform any photo-shop magic on my pictures. I’m proud of the skin I’m in.